Monday, May 4, 2015

Johnny Fake-o...

To those of you who it may concern... I am NOT Johnny Kimpo.

And to those who really thought my name was Johnny freakin' Kimpo you're an idiot.

Truth is the name doesn't make the blog, the blog makes the name. Johnny Kimpo means short, but sweet. It means late, but awesome. For those unfortunate viewers of this pathetic attempt of a blog I am sorry that I've wasted your time with such weak, and cowardly messages of thought. Truth is I'm not very emotional all the time and if that upsets you then you should  stop being nice and commenting on my crap.

Johnny Kimpo isn't just a name on the internet, and it's no longer cover...

I am Jonah Robison.
And I'm awesome.

Sunday, March 22, 2015

Oh pillow...

To that soft rectangle that keeps my round head from danger during the night...

I love you.

You're my best hello, and my hardest goodbye. The blankets are meaningless if it meant that I couldn't have you. Your billowy softness gives me all of the warmth that I need

To that cloud like piece of heaven on my bed...

I hate you.

You always make me late to school because of your tempting automatic snooze button. As inviting as you are I can't stand the fact that you are the reason I have to go to 30 attendance schools.

I guess you could say that I have pretty mixed emotions to what we call "pillows". It's a love, hate relationship that no one will understand.

Animal Laughs

I love animal puns

This is GOLD

Sorry it's the start of the new week, I though you'd get a good kick out of those. I would give you more but as you can see I have run out of room. 


Sunday, March 15, 2015

Fear is a March

What drives us to overcome what frightens us most? I like to think that it's one of the reasons we're human.

Adventure is life's greatest illusion because what is a little curiosity without fear making us doubt. I don't even know if I believe what constitutes a fear really. I spend most of my time avoiding it so I really wouldn't know.

I'm afraid of clowns...
serial killers
and jack rabbits (don't ask me why)

I don't know if I'll ever come over any of them, I mean... that's pretty rough.

Life in the Wind

I live a simple life.

I check my phone morning and night and sit by the fire while playing the guitar to myself. I take sips of hot chocolate and say things like "gosh dang that stuff's hot". I stare into the distance every sundown and think about this mysterious thing called life. Where will it take me? Will I have fulfilled my duties as a human being?

How to lick a frozen pole and not get your tongue stuck

1. You first apply a hot water source to the pole, then begin to lick

2. You spit saliva on pole until slick, then begin to lick

3. You bring the pole to Africa for a few days, then begin to lick. Though you will probably pick up diseases so I would not advise it.

slow down son

I was never the one in the fast lane so it seemed like everyone else was. "Slow down son!" I would say, and they'd never listen. They don't listen because they claim they don't have the time to listen. I take things easier, and solve my problems tactically and cleverly. No one has ever told me to slow down because I'm already slow. Sometimes I wonder how that strategy will work out who knows, I'm lovin' it now, that counts for something!